I love your perspective. It helps me to reflect reflect differently on my life. My little brother died 3 years ago. He had been homeless for many years, addicted to drugs, stealing whatever he could. I watched him slip through the societal cracks as he was put back out on the streets after brief hospitalizations. I was told repeatedly, SC has no program or help for mentally ill homeless people. When he died I went to the funeral home to collect his belongings.. they didn't even cover the bottom of a plastic grocery bag. I pulled over on the side of the road and cried. I cried for the sweet boy he was and how life seemed to feel him a bad hand at every turn, mostly by wrong decisions in his life. I had a small life insurance policy mom paid on for years and I took over after he died. We cremated him and waited for his headstone to come in before we had a simple service and buried his ashes ourselves, right by mom and dad. I bought him a beautiful headstone I knew he'd love. I had them carve "Back in Mother's Arms" on it. He didn't have anything beautiful in his life for decades. I was determined he would be remembered with a beautiful marker. It was the last thing on this earth I could do for him. He was only 58 when he died. You are right when you say we are only a razors edge away from tragedy. My perfect life ended with the death of my son the next year. I'm sorry I wrote so much. There were things inside me this opened up and they had to come out. Keep writing, and thank you for helping me "see" inside this part of me I don't touch that often.
"And about how we’re all much closer to the razor’s edge than we’d care to admit. We’re one tragedy, mistake or bad decision from being in a much, much darker place."
This hits home. The fact that we shouldn't have to wait until tragedy hits to understand and appreciate what we have doesn't usually work because most of the time there's denial that it could ever happen to us.
I love that you took the time to hear Mike's story, and I also hope that he's doing OK. Seeing another's humanity and showing them love can change the trajectory of that person's life more than we know.
Thank you for writing about grief for men. It's a topic that is sorely overlooked. Your honesty, openness, and perspective is impactful. ❤️
Thank you so much Janine. I appreciate your encouragement very much.
You're so right about how easy it is to be in denial that these things could happen to us.
I can remember, during my wife's mental health issues, feeling like if I was a guest on Oprah telling our story, I would have been the person watching on TV saying, "Wow. That could never happen to me."
I’ve been thinking about this often, I made a decision that has drastically changed my life and I’m not sure what path this one will lead to. I am on the edge. Some days are better than others, but I am one slip away from a cascade..of, of..I guess anything. Strong back, soft front. I’ll keep going.
I hope things turn out the way you're hoping Amy. I love the phrase "strong back, soft front." I'd never heard it before and I'm so glad you shared it with me! ♥️
Beautifully written. I’ve made my share of bad decisions. Taken lots of wrong turns. So far, I’ve been lucky. I’ve pulled out of the tailspin before crashing in a fiery flaming implosion.
I’m glad I found you.
There have been a couple of times, during this journey, that I almost chose a darker route.
Now I understand more clearly how devastating that would have been for all the lives left behind.
Thank you for sharing your journey of healing and learning.
Thank you so much for reading and adding your voice to the conversation Deborah. I appreciate it. And I'm glad you've made it through some of your more difficult experiences ♥️♥️
I love your perspective. It helps me to reflect reflect differently on my life. My little brother died 3 years ago. He had been homeless for many years, addicted to drugs, stealing whatever he could. I watched him slip through the societal cracks as he was put back out on the streets after brief hospitalizations. I was told repeatedly, SC has no program or help for mentally ill homeless people. When he died I went to the funeral home to collect his belongings.. they didn't even cover the bottom of a plastic grocery bag. I pulled over on the side of the road and cried. I cried for the sweet boy he was and how life seemed to feel him a bad hand at every turn, mostly by wrong decisions in his life. I had a small life insurance policy mom paid on for years and I took over after he died. We cremated him and waited for his headstone to come in before we had a simple service and buried his ashes ourselves, right by mom and dad. I bought him a beautiful headstone I knew he'd love. I had them carve "Back in Mother's Arms" on it. He didn't have anything beautiful in his life for decades. I was determined he would be remembered with a beautiful marker. It was the last thing on this earth I could do for him. He was only 58 when he died. You are right when you say we are only a razors edge away from tragedy. My perfect life ended with the death of my son the next year. I'm sorry I wrote so much. There were things inside me this opened up and they had to come out. Keep writing, and thank you for helping me "see" inside this part of me I don't touch that often.
JoAnn - what a beautiful comment from a sister who obviously loves her brother deeply.
The part about how you wanted to give him something beautiful because he didn't have anything beautiful in his life brought me to tears.
And I'm so, so sorry you lost your son. That's so much loss in such a short period of time and it must be so hard to carry.
I'm grateful you wrote as much as you did and touched that my writing helped you connect to such an important part of your experience.♥️♥️
Peace to you JoAnn.
"And about how we’re all much closer to the razor’s edge than we’d care to admit. We’re one tragedy, mistake or bad decision from being in a much, much darker place."
This hits home. The fact that we shouldn't have to wait until tragedy hits to understand and appreciate what we have doesn't usually work because most of the time there's denial that it could ever happen to us.
I love that you took the time to hear Mike's story, and I also hope that he's doing OK. Seeing another's humanity and showing them love can change the trajectory of that person's life more than we know.
Thank you for writing about grief for men. It's a topic that is sorely overlooked. Your honesty, openness, and perspective is impactful. ❤️
Thank you so much Janine. I appreciate your encouragement very much.
You're so right about how easy it is to be in denial that these things could happen to us.
I can remember, during my wife's mental health issues, feeling like if I was a guest on Oprah telling our story, I would have been the person watching on TV saying, "Wow. That could never happen to me."
I’ve been thinking about this often, I made a decision that has drastically changed my life and I’m not sure what path this one will lead to. I am on the edge. Some days are better than others, but I am one slip away from a cascade..of, of..I guess anything. Strong back, soft front. I’ll keep going.
I hope things turn out the way you're hoping Amy. I love the phrase "strong back, soft front." I'd never heard it before and I'm so glad you shared it with me! ♥️
Thank you Jason! Strong back, soft front comes from Joan Halifax, Standing at the Edge.
"There but for the grace of god go I." <3
Amen Stephanie ♥️
Enjoyed this 🤍
We are all Mike. We are all one ✨
Thank you Kay ♥️♥️
Thanks for the good reminder.
I'll thank my Dad again today ♥️
Thanks, Jason, for your voice! You are a blessing! Take care
Thank you brother. I appreciate your encouragement! ♥️
Beautifully written. I’ve made my share of bad decisions. Taken lots of wrong turns. So far, I’ve been lucky. I’ve pulled out of the tailspin before crashing in a fiery flaming implosion.
I’m glad I found you.
There have been a couple of times, during this journey, that I almost chose a darker route.
Now I understand more clearly how devastating that would have been for all the lives left behind.
Thank you for sharing your journey of healing and learning.
Love.
That is all that can save any of us in a moment.
Thank you so much for reading and adding your voice to the conversation Deborah. I appreciate it. And I'm glad you've made it through some of your more difficult experiences ♥️♥️
I resonated with your sharing about Mike and how he was such a beautiful reflection. You have come a long way in this life. Well done.